Running on Empty

I’ve been running on empty since my pregnancy with Nu.

Thinking that I was fighting Fibromyalgia, I actually engaged in a drawn out raid and burn on my body. Any leeway I made was immediately voided by my overreaching ways.

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Tired… Just tired

There’s no denying it, a family with a mortgage in a big city can’t live on one income forever. So I rushed back to work, not realising how deep the deficit caused by pregnancy and the first year of parenthood was. I thought that “only 20 hours” was a fibro friendly compromise. And I have managed, but at a cost.

My neck has deteriorated to the point that it stops me from obtaining many whole sleep cycle most nights (90 minutes, necessary to reach the deeper sleep state and repair). We’re meant to have about four a night. No pain relief can mute the pain and it’s always tight and stiff.

So, at the conclusion of my work contract, I have chosen to take a break. There are many things I need to do, but I will hopefully have the freedom to rest as well.

Here are the self care practices I plan to engage in:

  • Rest and meditation
  • Pacing
  • Swimming and spa soaks
  • Good, whole food

I’m really hoping I get another appointment with the pain clinic and that they might have something, other than medicines that don’t work or have severe side effects, to help. If I can control my neck, I can sleep. If I could sleep, properly, regularly, the possibilities are endless!

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6 thoughts on “Running on Empty

  1. I’m really sorry to hear things didn’t work out for you and that your symptoms have deteriorated. Isn’t hindsight wonderful? So many times I have made similar mistakes.

    I hope the rest helps you. I got into a cycle where my fibromyalgia just got worse and worse and I thought there was no way back up. After a rather big wake up call I’m pleased to say I’ve slowly been crawling my way back up. I hope the same is true for you too.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What kind of pillow are you using? Over the years Ive tried just about every kind of pillow out there to mitigate my neck problems. So far the one I wake with the least amount of neck pain is a down feather pillow. Some people find relief from those tempurpedic pillows, or pillows specifically designed for various sleeping positions.
    Have you tried a TENS unit? There are some that you can now buy like at Walmart. I got mine through my physical therapist a long time ago and still use it when my neck gets really stiff and isn’t responding to pain killers.
    Another none medicinal option to try are natural pain creams. I read good reviews of the CBD Pain relief cream from Fey Farms that several of the Chronic Bloggers got to try for review. I haven’t tried it yet, but use a pain cream from here in Oregon and have added extra essential oils to it.
    One last thing since this is turning into a book, watch for my post May 9th about a new sleep aid I’m trying for review! (I just started it and really like it, waiting to try it for a full month before giving final review)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for your message! I have three pillows that I have to alternate, a memory foam, a medium high one and a flatter one 😮
      I love my TENS machine but I can’t tolerate it near my neck. I have a similar type of cream but my problem in the night is that I’m too tired and sore to do anything, I forget there’s things I can do and don’t really have coordination. I have found my neck is better when I don’t overdo it but between work and a toddler I very rarely don’t overdo it! Fibro problems! Looking forward to your post about sleep help!

      Liked by 1 person

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